Sun, 24 Feb 2008

Parenting . . .

This morning I started a Wiki about parenting. I ran across a site in the ads on the web page and it started me thinking about this important topic. I have three kids who are in or approaching their teen years and I think I'll need all the help I can get. It's an important job -- the most important job I can think of -- and I don't want to get it wrong. I'll be exploring what I can do and will record it on the wiki as I get time.

posted 10:18 [/WhatAreYou] permanent link

Sun, 12 Aug 2007

Knowkedge of their culture . . .

Having Google ads on the site leads to some interesting things. I recently had one come up on the blog which stated, "Stimulate a childs imagination and knowledge of their culture". The site was for African Americans with CD's for sale with stories related to the history of that group in the U.S.

It got me to thinking about the importance of culture to our identity. I don't identify with any particular culture although my mother was a first-generation Sweedish-American. Therefore, I have some mixed feelings about all this. My mother never pushed the Sweedish ancestry. We did observe some traditions around the holidays -- primarily Christmas. But, these typically involved food traditions. I always wonder when I see something like this why people don't identify with the U.S.

As I have said before, I'm an old white guy, and therefore, I guess not entitled to a "culture". OK, I guess I could qualify for the Sweedish-American club like a person of Italian ancestry might belong to the U.S. Bocce Federation. But, as for basing my identity on a particular culture -- I don't. I suppose you could say that my culture is American -- whatever that is.

It seems that there are some groups which seem to need that cultural identity -- African Americans, Orientals, Italians, etc. Some of the strong cultural identity seems to come from the fact that some groups appear to have never left their country. Rather, they appear to have brought their country with them. Take for example, the "China Towns", "Little Vietnams" and other ethnic areas which are a fixture of many urban areas. You are transported to a place where the business signs are in their language and the place seems more like that country than the U.S.

The ghetto (1) has been a refuge for immigrants, new to the U.S. with no English skills and, perhaps no one to help them. People tend to group together for mutual support and little communities form. Here is the U.S. -- perhaps because we are a large country -- some of these communities have resulted in little assimilation into a U.S. culture for these groups. There are people who have been here for 20 years or more who still cannot speak English. Their cultural identity is little different from what it was in their own country.

The U.S. has always been accepting of this type of thing. We are, after all, a nation built by immigrants. Technically, I guess, all countries were built by immigrants except those portions of Africa where human beings first evolved. But, the difference is we have done it over the last hundreds of years, not milenia as in Europe or Asia.

So what part does culture play in your identity? How much of it is personal perception and how much of it is shared cultural experience? What, for example, is an Italian-American? What shared experiences do upper class orientals share with poorer members of their race here in the U.S.?

Historic events such as slavery for the African-Americans or the experiences of the Native Americans here in the U.S. certainly constitute a cultural heritage. These historical shared heritage are certainly part of a person's identity. Of course, some would say that these two groups are experiencing current fall out from these elements of their culture.

Some cultural identity is apparent through shared on-going experience such as Cuban-Americans, many of whom seem to be waiting for the time when they will return to their island. Miami is more cuba in many parts than it is the U.S. Many Mexican-Americans who are in the U.S. because of economic opportunity would probably have never left their country if they could have found a decent job there. Other immigrants were driven out of their countries because of conflict or other strife. I really wonder how many of these hyphenated Americans would return to their countries if the conditions were different? This could be one reason why they bring their culture with them, they never wanted to leave in the first place and would prefer to return if possible.

This has been a rather rambling set of thoughts about culture as a part of what we are. I'm not certain what I want to actually say about culture as a part of our identity. I wonder if, in the future, someone in another country will identify themselves as an "American- . . ." and just what cultural elements they will bring with them to their new home.

1 Here I am using the term ghetto in its sense as "an area where people from a specific racial or ethnic background live as a group in seclusion." (see Wikipedia).

posted 08:25 [/WhatAreYou] permanent link

Thu, 21 Jun 2007

Way to go, Al!

In response to the question:

Do you think Italian American culture is represented unfairly in film and on TV?

Al Pacino answered:

Explain to me what Italian American culture is. We've been here 100 years. Isn't Italian American culture American culture? That's because we're so diverse in terms of intermarriage. Most everybody who's Italian is half Italian. Except me. I'm all Italian. I'm mostly Sicilian, and I have a little bit of Neapolitan in me. You get your full dose with me.

[Time Magazine, June 25, 2007, "10 Questions"]

I love the response, "Isn't Italian American culture American Culture?" I'm also interested in the statement that most everybody who's "Italian" is really half Italian. I've thought about this before. Just when does a hyphenated American become just an American. And if an American moves to another country do they become an American-Spaniard, or American-Italian? And if you are an Italian-American and you move to Mexico, for example, are you an Italian-American-Mexican? . . . and then you move to . . . well, you get the idea.

It's refreshing to hear this expressed. Why aren't we just Americans? Is the culture in the U.S. that poor that we don't think it worth just being an American even after hundreds of years? Or are we just too diverse that we keep our ancestry close?

And what are some of these hyphenated cultural groups. Just because your ancestors were from some country, does that give you somethng in common or are the differences of income, location, experiences, make more of a difference than any commonality? And how many of us are married to someone from a different culture or had parents who were from different cultures or have grandparents who were . . .

I have never personally identified with any particular hyphenated group despite my mother being first-generation Swedish-American. Yes, my mother made some Swedish dishes, but we never really talked about Swedish culture or heritage. I have always thought of myself as American. But, hey, that's just me and maybe Al.

posted 20:46 [/WhatAreYou] permanent link

Sun, 17 Jun 2007

Father's Day, 2007

Today I am a father. Actually, my kids would say Papa. Actually EVERY DAY I am a father. I consider it one of the most important things I do and am proud to count myself among the fathers of the world. My family isn't here this year. They're in Spain. So I am spending today alone. But, if anyone asked me what are you? I would still happily answer a dad.

But in the circle of life, I am also a son. My father is long dead, but his influence is in everything that I am. Raising adults is one of the most important things we do. Yes, I know most people refer to it as raising kids, but we really aren't raising kids. We don't want these young people to end up being kids. We want them to be adults. So in that case, we are raising adults. We are giving our children the firm foundation from which they will become responsible, successful adults.

My kids are well on their way. I miss them very much, but know that they are getting the experiences that will help them mature into the fine adults that I know I can be.

So to all you fathers out there stuggling to raise another generation of adults -- happy father's day!

posted 13:01 [/WhatAreYou] permanent link

Sun, 10 Jun 2007

A Lesson in Diversity at the Mall

I was at the laboratory in the mall yesterday -- sitting in the food court -- when I got to thinking about the people around me. I was struck not by the differences, but by the similarities among the various ethnic groups.

To be politically correct, I guess you can't call them differences. It's PC to call it diversity. There were a large number of people of color at the mall this evening. Of course, I have always thought of the pinkish/brownish/beige of my skin as a color and white is technically all colors while black is the absence of color, so calling an African American a person is color is a bit of a misnomer . . . of course, black people really aren't black but some shade of brown which is a color . . .

Anyway, whatever the pallet, here they were, people of all colors, eating, talking, laughing, shopping, going about their daily lives. If God had turned out the light, you would not be able to tell one family from another. The mothers did mother things, the fathers did father things, the kids did kid things, the teens did . . . well, you know whatever teens do. In short, if you were blind to the physical differences in appearance, you would be hard pressed to tell one family from another.

The kids were spilling things, running around, acting like kids everywhere and the mothers and fathers, with slight variations were getting exasperated like mothers and fathers everywhere. Young couples were tending to their babies, older couples were tending to their grown children and husbands and wives were walking with the grandfathers and grandmothers in the extended families.

As I watched, I realized when you really stop to look at any of us, that' really what we are -- not black, not white, not brown, but, fathers, mothers, sons, daughters -- families. We are more alike than different. More the same than diverse. So why is there so much hate?

posted 14:38 [/WhatAreYou] permanent link

Wed, 06 Jun 2007

Multitasking . . . NAH . . . Interrupt-Driven

OK, so this isn't really a "What are You?" topic, but I have been thinking about my work life a lot recently. This is probably because I have been working a good deal of overtime recently. So, if someone were to ask me "what are you?" last week, say, I might have answered "interrupt-driven". Either that or, "over worked and under paid."

Do you every worry about multitasking. That is you worry that you won't have to do two or more things at once. I don't have that problem. I can only do one thing at a time -- most of us really do that. So the situation is that we need to switch between many things very quickly.

My work life is interrupt-driven. I get started on something and something else comes along which demands my attention. So I switch to that when something else comes along . . . well, you get the picture. I'm actually pretty good at it. I can existing in this chaos even though I really don't enjoy it much. The key is to be able to pick up on something quickly, stop it, start something else quickly, stop that, and finally be able to complete the things that were interrupted. The key is not to be able to do more than one thing at a time, but to be able to sustain the interrupted thing while attending to the interruption and then resume the original thing, sometime with a minimum of start up time.

I guess because I can do this through several interruptions, you might say that I'm interrupt-driven.

posted 20:18 [/WhatAreYou] permanent link

Sun, 08 Apr 2007

Those I Affect . . .

I am who I affect -- my kids, my friends, my family. The effect that I have on others is the part of me that lives on. Some would call it a legacy, but it is more than that. I can have an effect that I don't even know about. Something I say or do in the presence of others can have an effect that I do not intend. I can affect people by things that I do and things that I don't do.

When I interact with someone, I leave something with them. It may be a very small effect or it might have a profound effect. We are all affected by those with whom we interact. My responsibility, especially with those that I love it to assure that my effect on them is positive and constructive. They will carry this with them in their future interactions with others. Especially with my children, the effect I have on them becomes part of their personality. I am raising adults, so what they become as an adult is important to me. It is through them that who I am lives on.

posted 12:57 [/WhatAreYou] permanent link

Wed, 21 Feb 2007

Hyphenated-Americans

Here in the U.S. we have a lot of hypenated-Americans. That is, Japanese-American, Arab-American, Mexican-American, You name it-American. There seems to be a great need to retain a tie to some other cultural identity when you move to the U.S. Are we saying that the U.S. doesn't have its own culture? Can't we just be American?

This morning I listened to an story about slaves of the Cherokee nation who were freed after the Civil War. These Cherokee Freedmen might be banned from the Cherokee nation. Although this isn't really the topic of this blog, it got me to thinking about cultural identity in relation to the question 'What are you?'

Cultural identity in the United States seems to be tied to somewhere else. This seems to even be true for people whose relatives have been in the U.S. for generations. With the exception of several regions such as the south east, there appears to be no cultural identity associated with the U.S. Perhaps this is because of our heritage as a melting pot for different cultures. Perhaps it is because of our willingness to assimilate cultures whole and without significant change into our society.

Take our langugage -- English -- for example. It is not a national language. In fact some governments to out of their way and incur great expense to make sure that materials are provided in the native languages of its residents rather than requiring that emigrants learn English. It's sad to me, when I see someone who has been in this country for decades unable (unwilling?) to speak English. Don't get me wrong, I see nothing wrong with speaking your native language. In fact, my wife and kids are bilinqual and I think it's great. And I'm also aware that there are genuine reasons why someone might have difficulty learning English. But I wonder about someone who is here and has never even made the attempt.

I think that the reason that cultural identify in the U.S. is tied to somewhere else is that we don't have a strong national identity as Americans. There might be a number of reasons in addition to that above for this:

• We are a large country compared to most
• We have historically been a mix of cultures
• We have accepted immigration readily over the years

Our culture is bland. That is, we don't have some strong national identity based on commonality. There is no real attempt to draw our peoples into a single culture. In fact, we favor individual cultural identities, rather than discouraging their existence. I guess just being an American is being proud of where you came from and proud of the fact that the United States accepted you for what you are rather than what we can make you.

posted 08:58 [/WhatAreYou] permanent link

Thu, 14 Sep 2006

What are you? : Age

Since my birthday just passed, I thought it appropriate to explore the aspect of age in the answer to the question. I am 57 now, but I have never given much thought to age. Oh, I think about it when those aches and pains occur in places where I never ached before for no apparent reason. Or something will happen which reminds me of my age. But, in general, I never think about it.

That isn't the case with the general media view of age, however. At least here in the USA, youth is celebrated and age is, well, ignored. It is good to be young, or at least use products and technhiques which give you the appearance of being young. In fact, youth -- or the appearance of youth -- is a multi-billion dollar industry. As you view television, movies, etc. you would think that the USA didn't consist of anyone over 30 and that anyone who was over 30 was just a "bit player" in life.

So how do we identify with youth? I think that most of us tend to perceive ourselves as younger than we are. This isn't necessarily a bad thing. Unless, of course, we try to do something for which our somewhat older bodies just aren't prepared and hurt ourselves! Thinking young can help you keep those faculties which tend to do to pot as we get older. Dilusion about our age can resuit, however, in some pretty silly things. Take the older lady who wants to dress like her teenage daughter without the benefit of a teenage body. Or the older gentleman who sees himself as the dashing young playboy that he was in his youth.

Sometimes misperceptions of our age and abilities can be downright dangerous. Take the older driver, for example, over extending their reflexes and resulting in an accident. But generally, perceptions of youth are harmless -- except, perhaps, to the sensibilities of others.

So what about the answer? Does age enter into the equation? I tend to think of myself as a old fat guy when I stop to think about it. When I can receive that senior discount, I sometimes realize that I'm not a young buck any more. So, I guess if you found me in one of those situations, age might enter into my description. It would usually be expressed as a modifier to my thinking rather than a major element of the description. Thus I might be an old programmer, or an old papa, but really not an old timer.

I had an aunt, who, in her late 80's used to refer to the old people. She definitely didn't think much of age when she spoke about herself, but did think of herself, at least peripherally, in terms of age when she spoke of others. You will sometimes hear that type of reference when the older individual speaks of the "kids" meaning someone in their 20's or my kids speaking of someone as old when refering to someone barely into their 30's. Perhaps age is a relative thing with many people.

posted 07:21 [/WhatAreYou] permanent link

Mon, 07 Aug 2006

Race

Race is probably, along with religion, one of the more delicate topics to discuss as an aspect of answering the question, "What are you?". In fact, I think it will probably take me more than a single blog to discuss the issue. This is primarily because I don't think much about race. I certainly don't identify myself as an old white guy -- which I am.

I grew up in a military family and was around people of all races so much that I didn't even know what prejudice was until high school -- and then only because we studied it. My parents welcomed people of all races equally into their home as friends. I never even thought that someone's color was a meaningful measure of them as individuals. I still don't. So this subject is a bit foreign to me.

Many people will say that I don't think of myself as an old white guy because I don't have to. I live in the U.S.A. and am of the predominent race. Therefore I don't face the same barriers and prejudice that others face daily. Perhaps it is this constant exposure to race that helps people think of themselves primarily as defined by the color of their skin.

Race, for me, is not an important component of my identity. Perhaps it should be more of one, but if you think I'm having some trouble identifying with that concept -- you're right. I think that this aspect of identity will require more thought and investigation on my part. It will definitely require more writing.

I wonder of people are more likely to identify with a particular race or ethnic identity if they are asked the question by someone of another race or ethnic background? Would a white male be less likely to mention race if asked by a person of color, than the converse? Do we tend to think of race when we are confronted by someone of a different skin color or ethnic background than when we are approached by someone of our own race.

I think I could get into a lot of trouble discussing this topic. Much better minds than I have considered the topic and continue to do so. Simply being a white guy and bringing up the topic can be considered bad taste by some people. Yet, here it is, because it is a component of our identity and an answer to the question, What are you?

posted 19:17 [/WhatAreYou] permanent link